As Shakespeare wrote in Romeo and Juliet, more or less: “What’s in a name? That which we call a fantasy team / By any other name would seem as sweet.”

It is a play that emphasises the importance of names. We cannot be sure if Shakespeare was in a fantasy league (fantasy bear-baiting?), but if the Bard did happen to have a team, he would have given serious thought to what to call it. No wonder that selecting the moniker by which your squad will be defined for the next ten months can often seem harder than choosing the players.

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Here is what the PlayTheGame rules say: “You are free to choose any team name up to 25 characters long, subject to decency rules.” So no foul and abusive language, thanks very much. After all, you are not professional footballers, you are only picking them.

And here is what logic and experience says: come up with a witty, smart, original team name and your rival owners are more likely to respect and admire you and not try to fleece you with unbalanced transfer offers on the assumption that you are a soft touch. Football these days: it is all about branding.

A look back through the team names from last year’s game reveals that you are an imaginative, diverse and frankly in some cases quite odd lot. Many plumped for the plainly obvious, such as real names: “AFC Geoff”. Some went for the equally predictable, the name of a favourite team: “Wigan Athletic FC”. But others liked to mock rivals (“LEEDSHAHA-HAHAHA”), support their heroes (“Ronaldo isn’t a diver”), send messages to managers (Bring Back Bergkamp”), be brutally honest (“Rubbish FC”) or reveal their literary preferences (“I love Harry Potter”). Whoever called their team “hot asian babes wiv guns” probably had the wrong website.

The most memorable names are a bit quirky, a bit funny, perhaps a touch surreal (yes, “Surreal Madrid” has been done) or a clever twist of the familiar. On the left is a list of our ten favourites from last year. And, hey, if you are not happy with the name you choose, you can always change it. We are more flexible than the Montagues and Capulets.

Our favourites

Ten of the best names from last year’s game

West Brom Rich Albion
Haven’t a Kalou
Bryan Munich
Muswell Hill Street Blues
May Defoes Be With You
Dynamo Chicken Kievs
Man Chest Hair United
Overpaid Narcissists Utd
Obi Wan Kenobi Nil
thisisbetterthandoingwork

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